The Ocean at the End of the Lane By Neil Gaiman

First line: "It was only a duck pond out at the back of the farm."

This sucker will leave you with a want for your own magical soul-search. Lord knows we need one of those because we're all lost little shits trying to fit in but not really wanting to because deep down we're all 'special snowflakes', but you know you gotta make connections because that's the only way you survive but that takes money and you're broke as fuck and you still have to pay rent and the landlady is scary.

(By the way, Kung Fu Hustle is top notch.)

Also, you should pay your rent on time. Just sayin'.

The Ocean at the End of the Lane starts with a grown man indulging in the memories of his seven year old self. To a certain extent, it is autobiographical. Neil--I'd like to be on first name basis here--Ugh I wish we were friends!--uses a lot of his own experiences from his childhood and gives them a magical polish in this novel. You'd especially identify with the protagonist if you were the quiet, lonely kid with a penchant for a wild imagination.

And if you've read most of his books, you'll see a very familiar surname making an appearance: The Hempstocks. I'm not going to tell you where among his books they appear because you're on the fucking internet. In this novel they're the companions our unnamed protagonist remembers on his trip down memory lane. I'd hate to go into a literary discussion over why their names are present and his isn't, but I'll leave it at this: Who you are now is not the child you were then because your identity is subjected to the fabric of time and circumstance. What you will remember though, are the people who influenced that part of your life.

Compared to his other works (Sandman, Stardust, American Gods, etc.) this one takes a light-hearted tone, but it's not without its essential Gaiman-esque depth. Neil will write a book for a child realistically, in that it'll be inventive, colourful, and quirky but dark. Some parts of the novel are especially disturbing to adults because you realise the implications. Nonetheless, the novel is simultaneously childlike enough for a 12 year old to understand it, and poignant enough to leave a dent in the heart of the grumpiest adult. So yes, buy this for everyone and anyone who doesn't hate magic! Especially that asshole who needs a nostalgic whack upside the head.

The plot is fairly linear, it doesn't jump or leave you hanging, but you will have to piece some parts together to make sense of it all. The action sequences will have you page-turning like your thumbs are on fire, but there were some dips in my interest levels. You've definitely got to give this book a second read to fully grasp the innuendo and the creatures he uses as symbolism.

Its portrayal of childhood will have you drawing parallels with your own. You know, those days when every little thing was a fantastical adventure, and you had friends aplenty to share it with. Now you don't really have any friends and reheating cold coffee in the microwave is the most adventure you've had all week.

Overall, I'd recommend this book to anyone who wants a momentary fragment of their childhood back because let's be real here: Adulthood sucks.

Kaijus on the other hand...

tl;dr
Are there animals in the novel?: A kitten (the least complex thing I can describe it as) among others.
Are there sexy times in it?: A pinch. It's about childhood, you pervert.
Are there dead people in it?: Yes and no. It's a fantasy novel. Death is complicated.
Is it lengthy?: Nope. You could finish this baby in a day.
Reread?: Yes sir, yes sir three bags full.
Judge the book by its cover: I think it's meh, but you'll see why this image is used.
Rating: 3.8/5 meows.

Pun: I think I Neil-ed this first one!